I have been angry with what Islam does to women in recent days. “In Islam, women are the property of men,” said Muslim B, who was very pious, when I asked him why female Muslims wear headscarves. The reason is simple. In Islam, men don’t allow their women to be seen by other men, which may cause other men to love their women. As a result, men might lose their women to others. For such reasons, there are rules for female Muslims. These rules appear as laws somewhere or as ideas to restrict women.

  1. A man cannot look at a female Muslim’s eyes while talking. And vice versa. (by Erika)
  2. Female Muslims should wear a headscarf or a burqa.
  3. Female Muslims should wear long sleeves and trousers, or anything similar, to cover their body so as not to be seen by others since men may like them once they see their skin. (by Erika)
  4. Female Muslims should stay at home, not go out to a commonplace.
  5. Female Muslims are expected to speak only within the confines of their homes.[1]

A single female Muslim may also explain to you that if you see their skin, face, or even only to be a friend of her, you may like her and then propose to her. However, she knows this is usually ridiculous after she rationally thinks about it. I found that Muslims from various countries share this idea.

Such rules, ideas, and behaviors always make female Muslims unfriendly in societal situations. In some cases, problems are severe. For example, a Muslim has no right to love or to choose whom to be her boyfriend or husband proactively. Only male Muslims have that right. A male Muslim can propose to any female Muslim, whoever she is, even to a stranger. But, whether the female Muslim marries (a female Muslim cannot date or be in a love relationship) him or not is only decided by her family or by her parents. It always leads to a bad marriage in her life, except that her fortune is so good. In another view, if a female Muslim has no one proposed to her, she becomes a leftover woman as she gets older. Even in this situation, she still manages to make herself invisible to men. Then, there will be no men interested in her. She might be alone for her whole life. In a society where only men can select women, no man likes an older (typically > about 34 years old, in my experience) woman who is unfamiliar to him.

Besides that, there’s a rule that causes trouble for female Muslims in some cases as well. “A female Muslim is only allowed to get married to a male Muslim. If not, the man proposed to her should become a Muslim before they get married.” Zaza expressed her love to a boy for being a couple. The boy rejected her since he didn’t want to become a Muslim.

Now we see that all the rules we mentioned above can lead female Muslims to bad situations for themselves. However, they will tell you that all the rules are in place to protect you from things like venereal disease and family issues. But, if they could talk to you freely, they would feel ridiculous after they rationally think about it. And then, they would feel sad since all the rules are not about protecting girls and are even harmful to them. Since women are the property of men in Islam, there are many news shows that female Muslims are hurt by men (usually in the name of Islam).

Through studying Islam in different countries, I observed various facts about the rules and ideas mentioned above.

  1. Religion is a system of knowledge about how the world works. Following a religion only means you believe that the world operates according to the teachings of that religion. (by Muslim B)

  2. Islam doesn’t forbid anyone to do anything or force anyone to do something. (by Erika)

  3. There are many restrictions on female Muslims. However, those restrictions are only enforced by people, not by the teachings of Islam. The problem is that most female Muslims think those restrictions are from the teachings of Islam and they should follow. Therefore, they are always controlled by others.

  4. If the teachings of Islam enforce a restriction (not enforced by people), all Muslims share such a restriction. We would see that Muslims all over the world have the same behavior to follow such a restriction.

Below are facts I observed about “female Muslims should be invisible to men and not allowed to date or be in a love relationship before marriage.”

  1. A female Muslim can be seen freely by men in most Muslim or Arabic countries, such as Egypt, Morocco, and Malaysia. No need to hide themselves, no worry about the result of being seen. In China, this is never a problem.

  2. In China, the purpose of why Hui people (100% Muslims) wear headscarves is not to make them invisible to men. So, they wear their headscarves very casually.

  3. A female Muslim can choose whether to wear a headscarf or not freely. (in Malaysia and China)

  4. A female Muslim can freely date or enter a love relationship with a boy, even not a male Muslim. (in Malaysia and China)

Below are facts I observed about “female Muslims should only get married to Muslims.”

  1. Erika married to a non-Muslim man. Her husband was not a Muslim after she got married.

  2. It’s common in China. (Some Chinese traditional Muslim families may ask that the male should be a Muslim.) In a large number of instances is that many PLA soldiers got married to Uyghur women(all are female Muslims) while developing Xinjiang. PLA soldiers cannot become Muslims.

  3. It’s just a law in Tunisia (99% of people are Muslims) from 1973 to 2017[2]. Such a law is considered harmful in Tunisia. Tunisian women celebrated that such a law was dropped.

  4. In the United States, for example, about 10% of Muslim women are married to Non-Muslim men, and about one in ten Muslims are married to Non-Muslims overall, including about one in six Muslims under the age of 40, and about 20% of Muslims who describe themselves as less devoutly religious.[3]

  5. “The Quran contains no explicit prohibition for Muslim women marrying Non-Muslim men.”[4][5]

Conclusion

It’s very sad to hear that there are many bad things applied to female Muslims, and all of them are often justified in the name of Islam. It’s great that some of these things are only applied by law or in societal rules, and there are many female Muslims who fight against that. In this situation, if a female Muslim escapes from such an environment, she can become free or at least not hurt by those restrictions. But, it’s sadder since there are many female Muslims who think such restrictions are to give them a better life or even proud that she is living with such restrictions. If it gives a better life for a woman, women all over the world would do that, scrambling. But no non-Muslim women do that.

I honestly hope that every female Muslim lives a better life and has more rights and courage in their life. May God love them and bless them every day!

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHr4qYkhvDw This channel has many videos discussing related topics. You can find Zaza and Erika mentioned in the text in this channel. (Mixing Chinese, English, Malay, and sometimes Arabic. With subtitles in Chinese and Malay.)

  1. https://cn.nytimes.com/world/20240906/women-taliban-prohibitions-afghanistan/ ↩︎

  2. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-41278610 ↩︎

  3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interfaith_marriage_in_Islam#Prevalence_and_attitudes ↩︎

  4. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interfaith_marriage_in_Islam#For_Muslim_women ↩︎

  5. https://www.al-monitor.com/originals/2020/11/egypt-muslim-interfaith-marriage-al-azhar-fatwas.html (Chinese translation) ↩︎